IS HE WORTHY OF A SECOND DATE
And you thought getting him to ask you out, then deciding what to wear was hard. Honey, it's just the beginning...

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In a perfect world, first dates would cause stomach-churning butterflies and propel you into a dizzy euphoria, leaving no doubt whether you wanted to see him again. Unfortunately, most dates leave you more confused than lovestruck. Either you like him but are concerned he's too good to be true, or you have a nothing-special first impression but don't want to turn him down prematurely in case he's a gem who needs time to shine. All you really need to do to guage his boyfriend potential is ask yourself four little questions...

DID HE ASK ABOUT YOU AND YOUR LIFE?
Kudos to the guy who talks about something other than how hot the waitress at the restaurant is, what time the footy starts and how stressed he is at work – he's obviously open to making room in his life for someone else.

There are two rules in dating that a guy should adhere to: talk about himself, but not too much (no one loves someone who's obsessed with themselves); and ask about the other person, but not too much (no one loves a Spanish Inquisition). If he begins every sentence with “I”, he may be self-centred. Granted, you need to allow for nervousness, which for some guys can manifest into all-about-him dribble, so test him: tell him something interesting about yourself and see if he digs deeper, or if he relates it back to when he...blah blah blah.

Susie, 24, knew almost immediately she wasn't going to waste another four hours of her life having dinner with Troy. “We both worked in public relations and the day after our first date, I was made redundant,” she says. “When he called to ask me out again I told him what had happened. All he said was 'damn that sucks.' Then he gushed about heading to Melbourne on a business trip. I could tell right away he wasn't exactly the sensitive type.”

DID YOU HAVE A “MOMENT”?
One of the best indications of a successful first date is when you experience a “moment”, such as finishing each other's sentence; speaking at the same time; or having the same thoughts on, say, a perfect Sunday morning.

Sure, long-term compatibility is usually determined by discovering you have common goals and values, but hearing his thoughts on child rearing might be a little serious on the first date. A “moment” on the other hand is an instant indication of whether you're on the same page or not.

DOES HE GIVE YOU BUTTERFLIES
Think about how you felt when his arm brushed yours – did it make your stomach flutter, or were you making a mental note to put your handbag on the arm closest to him so he couldn't hold your hand? Your gut reaction is one of the best ways to determine how interested you are. If you like him, your whole body will feel it.

“On my first date with Daniel, I felt a vibe between us straightaway,” says Julia, 26. “We leant in close over dinner and I was oblivious to everything around me. I remember lifting my wine glass to my mouth and I could feel myself shaking a little.”

ARE YOU STILL THINKING ABOUT HIM?
It's like shopping: you try on a pair of shoes and they look great but you ask yourself, “Are they exactly what I'm looking for?” To determine if you really like the shoes, you walk away and see if you're still thinking about them a few days later. Same goes for dating: distance yourself from him for a bit and see if he stays on your mind. If you don't give him a second thought, it's not a great sign. After all, if you wanted the shoes, you would've gone back as soon as possible, right?

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- Bronwyn McCahon