THE ULTIMATE DATING GUIDE FOR MEN.
Women confess their likes and dislikes on dating.
Check out these 98 smooth moves – how to ask her out – how to treat her right – how to make your moves!

THE BIG ASK

1. The cardinal rule about asking a woman out is to do it when you're alone.

2. When it comes to the actual words used to ask a woman out, do it in two stages. First, there should be an initial question that guages her level of interest. This should be pretty vague – something along the lines of “Would you like to do something sometime?” is fine. If you get a green light, your second one must be confident and you must have a specific plan in mind. Pitch it along these lines: “I'd really like to take you to a movie/dinner/show next Saturday.”

3. You don't have to ask someone out the night you meet them. Instead, make your first mission to obtain her phone number or e-email address. Then contact her a day or two later. If you get a response, it means she wants you to ask her out.

4. Don't feel you have to find out whether she's got a boyfriend before you ask her out. She'll let you know if this is the case before you even get close to asking.

5. Even if you do want to bonk me senseless, I don't want to feel like that's why you're asking me out.

6. Approach me with some confidence. Go in expecting a knock-back and that's what you'll get.

7. Don't use the word “please” at any point while asking a woman out. There's manners and there's moronic.

8. If you're going to ask me out for Saturday, do it no later than Wednesday – I do have a life, you know.

9. Friday is good for a first date because it doesn't have that pressure of being the main event of the weekend. And if things go well, you can extend it knowing you don't have to get up early the next day for work.

10. When proposing an activity for a first date, try to go with something you can both escape from if necessary, like a drink after work. For the second date, it's all about the shared experience – wandering through the markets or a movie. If you get to a third, she's obviously fairly keen on you, so think up something special and romantic, like a dinner with a water view.

11. Don't ask someone on a date via e-mail or SMS. Have the balls to do it face-to-face.

12. Unless you happen to know she's specifically interested in something – I'm a huge AFL fan for instance – your planned activity should be open enough so the person being asked can have some input.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

13. If you're running late, call.

14. Always offer to pick her up. Even if she refuses, she'll appreciate the gesture.

15. Don't honk the horn when you're out the front. Get out of the car and come to the door.

16. When you arrive to pick her up, say “Wow you look gorgeous” or something of that ilk. Do not use the word “sexy”. Be nice to whoever else is home – no, make that be charming.

17. Clean out your car. No one likes climbing over coke cans and chip packets. Keep the music low and don't drive like a lunatic – remember she's precious cargo.

18. It's important to open and close the car door for her. It'll also score big points with me if a man helps me into his car with a gentle guiding hand on my lower back.

19. She'll have gone to some effort with her appearance, so do the same. That means no shorts, no T-shirts you brought at a rock concert, no flannels and don't wear white socks.

20. Too much aftershave is worse than none at all.

21. Forget any gifts, like flowers. It's way over the top and can make a woman feel uncomfortable – especially if it's the first date.

22. If you're picking a girl up, punctuality is important. Early is desperate and late is insulting.

PUB RULES

23. Don't “accidently” run into your mates while on a date. Women aren't attracted to men who need their buddies on hand as a safety net.

24. Don't get pissed and definitely don't ask if she'd like a “screaming orgasm” - all those cocktail names are tacky.

25. If a gorgeous woman walks past, keep your eyes on the girl you're there with. And don't think you can sneak a quick perve – we can always tell.

26. If you're on a date, don't take her to your local where you're going to spend half the evening chatting to other people, while she sits there waiting for her turn.

27. If you decide to share a bottle of wine, don't pretend to be some sort of wine buff. And even if you are, still keep it to yourself.

28. Your mobile phone and the pokies should not come into play on a pub date.

29. Unless there's a band playing, don't ask me to dance. There's far more chance of you touching me later in the evening if you leave the jukebox alone.

30. If you asked her out, it;s your shout until she offers to buy a round.

31. Don't have a lite beer on a date – real men don't drink the stuff. The same goes for cocktails. Stick with spirits like scotch and bourbon, or beer. Do not order a Seabreeze.

32. Give her the option of selecting a pub she's comfortable in, or at least run your choice of pub by her before deciding on it. Somewhere mutually convenient is good, but nothing too scungy.

33. Don't make me think you're more interested in what's on the big-screen TV than you are in me.

34. Unless you happen to be a professional singer, avoid karaoke at all costs. She won't find it attractive.

MOVIE CREDITS

35. Have a movie in mind before you ask, but make sure it's something not too blokey – like Jackie Chan. You want a man who has the confidence to choose a film both of you will enjoy. Traffic or Blow are perfect examples.

36. Avoid movies with gratuitous sex scenes or divisive issues like abortion or capital punishment. That said, a little bit of controversy to spark conversation later on is good.

37. Don't take her to a movie starring a box-office hunk, because you'll never look good compared.

38. The only two words you need to remember for movie dates are “romantic comedy.”

39. When you're on a movie date, treat her like a lady. Ask where she'd like to sit and if she realises during the trailers that she'd like something from the candy bar, go get it for her.

40. Don't try to hold her hand during the movie if you're on a first or second date. It's cringy and reminds me of high school. The same goes for the yawn over the shoulder trick. Soooo lame.

41. If you're not enjoying the movie, keep it to yourself and don't ruin it for her by saying “as if”, or slagging if off.

42. Don't make her dress up for a first or second date, as this won't make her feel spoiled or special – just uncomfortable.

43. Be mindful of what you order on a first date. No man looks good slurping pasta or tucking into a rack of ribs. Stick to solids you can cut, like steak.

44. If you're out at dinner, make sure you check for stray bits of food in your teeth afterwards.

45. Whoever does the asking-out on a first date should pay. By the second date, though, you should be going Dutch.

46. Choose somewhere too snooty too early and the woman can get the feeling you're expecting something in return.

47. Ask if she'd like a taste of yours, especially if it's dessert – but make sure she understands you're (mainly) referring to the food.

48. Before making a booking somewhere, get some idea of her cuisine likes and dislikes, such as whether she's a vegetarian.

49. If you're not sure how to pronounce something on the menu, ask, instead of taking the risk of trying to sound like you speak fluent Thai. And don't make the “Kum of Sum Yung Gai” joke.

50. Receiving the bill can be the worst moment of a dinner date. An awesome thing for a guy to do is to give the maitre d your credit card halfway through the dinner on you way to the toliet, so that when the bill arrives, it's all taken care of. It's smooth without being too Mr Sheen.

51. Table manners are so important when on a date. Remember what your mum told you about talking with your mouth full.

52. Even if the waitress is attractive, the only person you should be flirting with is me.

53. Don't be a miserly tipper or we'll think your lack of generosity extends to other areas of your personality. But don't go to flash, either. About 10 per cent is fine.

54. Unless you've been together for a while, restrain yourself from asking if she's “done with that” before picking at her leftovers

55. If you're nervous about finding things to talk about, try a themed restaurant where there will be plenty of distractions. For a second date, make sure you understand the difference between intimate and intimidating.

SAY WHAT?

56. While on a date, don't talk about exes – hers or yours.

57. Innuendo is fine, but leave it at that. If you think there's a chance of coming across too porno, keep your mouth shut.

58. Don't go in there with your winning lines planned – it all sounds contrived.

59. Don't tell her how much you earn. Remember, women know when someone is talking out of their arse.

60. Confidence is good, but always keep it toned down. If you come across as arrogant, girls are going to be scared off. They'll think you'll sleep around on them.

61. Think of a date as a job interview – be quietly confident. The more achievements you mention, the fewer she'll think you've accomplished.

62. The worst mistake you can make is to give the impression that she should be thrilled to be going out with you.

63. Don't say anything that worked for someone in a Hollywood movie, because it won't do the same for you. The same goes for dropping Simpsons quotes.

64. Less talking, more listening. Let the other person speak, focus your attention on them by looking into their eyes and respond in an intelligent way. Do not use the time she's not speaking to compose the next brilliant thing you may be about to say.

65. Sex, religion and politics are all OK to discuss, as long as it's not too deep or heavy. If you're going to have a relationship with someone, a girl likes to suss out where he stands on certain issues fairly early on.

66. If you've had a bad day at work, leave your problems there. Especially if you're on a first date.

67. Don't be afraid to flirt, but if there's the slightest chance of being thought of as sleazy, move on to your next point.

68. Even if you're not really listening to what she's saying, at least pretend you are with a bit of earnest nodding.

69. If she's telling you about a problem she's having, don't try to play the knight and suggest solutions. Women want empathy. Something like, “that must have been very frustrating/hurtful,” will work far better for you.

70. Don't say how great her top makes her cleavage look.

71. If you have a favourite restaurant where the staff know you, take her there on the second or third date. She'll be impressed that you frequent restaurants enough for the owners to value your patronage, and it's also a good sign that you're polite and make friends easily.

72. Be careful with compliments. If you tell her she looks gorgeous don't make it sound rehearsed. Instead, compliment her on something specific, like her dress or her hair.

73. Few women find sport as fascinating as you.

74. Trying to impress is unimpressive.

75. Please don't ask what my star sign is.

76. Don't be too cocky or presumptuous. Asking how I'd like my eggs in the morning means you'll never find out.

THE PASH IS ON

77. If she's up for a goodnight kiss, the distance between you will get closer throughout the night.

78. Respect her body space – let her invade yours. And if you're at all unsure, go in for a soft one on the cheek.

79. If she becomes more tactile over the course of the evening, you've got at least a goodnight kiss coming your way.

80. She's up for a pash if she looks into your eyes a lot and hesitates after saying goodnight.

81. If you want to get closer to her, go for it, as a lot of women may be keen, but don't want to make the first move. But make sure you watch how she reacts: if she baulks, back off. If she remains receptive, she's obviously OK with it.

82. It's a good sign if she's leaning in towards you across a table on her elbows.

83. If she is in a hurry to whip out her keys and get through the door, you won't be getting a goodnight kiss, so don't even bother trying. If she lingers and chats, she's waiting for something.

84. I subconsciously rub the top of my glass a lot when I'm interested in someone.

COME ON UP

85. More than a kiss is on the cards when each one gets longer and longer.

86. I prefer it when a man waits until a third date before he tries to take things further. A good sign that she's ready is whether she's receptive to going back to your or her place after dinner or the pub. Don't try to trick her into doing it by saying you left something there, or some other pathetic lie. “Do you want to come back to my house for a drink?” will do the job.

87. If she's grabbing your butt and pulling you so close you're about to be behind her – she wants more than just a kiss, babe. Other signs include groaning while kissing you, tousling your hair while kissing you and sliding up and down on you like a fireman's pole.

88. The only way you know if more than a goodnight kiss is on the cards, is to wait for an invitation in the form of “would you like to come in?” or something similar. Never presume.

89. If she's in no hurry to end the night, chances are there's more than a goodnight kiss on the cards. By that, I mean if she suggests coffee after dinner, then a nightcap after coffee.

90. If you're unsure try the following line, which a guy once used on me: “I don't want to end the night here, but I want to know what you want to do?” I said, “I want to get a taxi home with you.”

ON CALL

91. Women can be pretty obvious when they want to be and when she asks if you'd like to come up for “coffee”, she's not asking if you'd like to come up for coffee.

92. Don't call the same night to say you enjoyed your evening with her – that's creepy. The next day is best and use the words “I had a really good time.”

93. Second day call keeps her wondering a bit.

94. Next day – no question.

95. Two days. Any longer I give up waiting, any shorter I think he's totally desperate.

96. Next day call back is mandatory. It shows I'm on his mind.

97. If you're going to ask her out again, wait for a couple of days and give her some advance warning – don't ring up and say, “What are you doing tomorrow?”

98. If you ask her out again, don't cancel or postpone. She'll think you weren't really keen on her and just asked out of politeness. Break the second date and you won't get a third.